It would seem, what else does the venerable bourgeois Mr. Jourdain need? Money, family, health - he has everything he could wish for. So, no, Jourdain decided to become an aristocrat, to become like noble masters. His mania caused a lot of inconvenience and excitement to the household, but it was in the hands of a host of tailors, hairdressers and teachers who promised through their art to make a brilliant noble cavalier out of Jourdain. And now, two teachers - dance and music - together with their students were waiting for the master of the house to appear. Jourdain invited them so that they would decorate the dinner, which he arranged in honor of one titled person, in a cheerful and refined performance.

Presenting himself to the musician and dancer, Jourdain first of all invited them to evaluate his exotic dressing gown - such, according to his tailor, in the mornings wears everything to know - and new liveries of his lackeys. Apparently, the size of the future fee of experts was directly dependent on the assessment of Jourdain’s taste, therefore the reviews were enthusiastic.

The dressing gown, however, became the cause of some hitch, because Jourdain could not decide for how long it was more convenient for him to listen to music - with or without him. After listening to the serenade, he found it freshish and, in turn, sang a lively street song, for which he again received praise and an invitation, among other sciences, to engage in music with dancing. The assurances of teachers that every noble gentleman will certainly learn both music and dance convinced him to accept this invitation from Jourdain.

A music teacher prepared a pastoral dialogue for the upcoming reception. In general, Jourdain liked him: since you can’t do without these eternal shepherds and shepherds - well, let yourself sing. The ballet presented by the dance teacher and his students pleased Jourdain completely.

Inspired by the success of the employer, the teachers decided to hammer the iron while it was hot: the musician advised Jourdain to arrange weekly home concerts, as he said, in all aristocratic houses; The dance teacher immediately began to teach him the most sophisticated of the dances - the minuet.

Exercises in graceful gestures were interrupted by a fencing teacher, a science science teacher - the ability to strike, but not to receive them himself. The dance teacher and his fellow musician amicably disagreed with the statement of the fencer about the absolute priority of the ability to fight over their time-honored arts. The people got up addicted, word for word - and a couple of minutes later a fight broke out between the three teachers.

When the teacher of philosophy came, Jourdain was delighted - who, if not the philosopher, should admonish the fighting. He willingly took up the cause of reconciliation: he commemorated Seneca, warned his opponents against anger that humiliates human dignity, and advised him to take up philosophy, this first of all sciences ... Here he went too far. They began to beat him along with the others.

A battered, but still crippled teacher of philosophy, in the end, was able to start the lesson. Since Jourdain refused to deal with logic - the words there are too tricky, - and ethics - why should he temper his passion, if all the same, if he breaks up, nothing will stop him, the learned husband began to devote him to the secrets of spelling.

Practicing the pronunciation of vowels, Jourdain rejoiced like a child, but when the first enthusiasm passed, he revealed to the philosophy teacher a big secret: he, Jourdain, is in love with a kind of high-society lady, and he needs to write a note to this lady. To the philosopher it was a couple of trifles - in prose, whether in poetry. However, Jourdain asked him to do without these same prose and poetry. Did the venerable bourgeois know that one of the most astonishing discoveries in life awaited him here - it turns out when he shouted to the maid: “Nicole, give me your shoes and a nightcap”, from his lips, just think, pure prose proceeded!

However, in the field of literature, Jourdain was still not a bastard - no matter how hard the teacher of philosophy tried, he was unable to improve the text composed by Jourdain: “Beautiful marquise! Your beautiful eyes promise me death from love. ”

The philosopher had to leave when Jourdain was informed of the tailor. He brought a new suit, made, of course, in the latest court fashion. The apprentices of the tailor, while dancing, made a renewal and, without interrupting the dance, clothed Jourdain in it. At the same time, his wallet suffered greatly: apprentices did not skimp on the flattering “your mercy”, “your excellency” and even “lordship”, and the extremely touched Jourdain did not tip.

In a new suit, Jourdain set out to stroll through the streets of Paris, but his wife resolutely opposed his intention - already half a city was laughing at Jourdain. In general, in her opinion, it was time for him to change his mind and leave his silly quirks: why, one wonders, would Jourdain fencing if he did not intend to kill anyone? Why learn dancing when your legs are about to fail?

Objecting to the woman’s senseless arguments, Jourdain tried to impress her with the maid by the fruits of his scholarship, but without much success: Nicole calmly uttered the sound “u”, not even suspecting that she was pulling her lips and bringing the upper jaw closer to the lower jaw, and she easily applied the rapier Jourdain received several injections, which he did not repel, since the unenlightened maid did not prick by the rules.

In all the stupidities that her husband indulged in, Mrs. Jourdain blamed the noble gentlemen who had recently begun to make friends with him. For the court dandies, Jourdain was an ordinary cash cow, but he, in turn, was confident that friendship with them gives him significant - as they are - pre-ro-ga-tives.

One of such great friends of Jourdain was Count Dorant. As soon as he entered the drawing room, this aristocrat paid several exquisite compliments to the new costume, and then fluently mentioned that this morning he was talking about Jourdain in the royal bedchamber. Having prepared the ground in such a manner, the count recalled that he owed his friend fifteen thousand eight hundred livres, so there was a direct reason for lending him another two thousand two hundred - for good measure. In gratitude for this and subsequent loans, Dorant took on the role of mediator in heart affairs between Jourdain and the subject of his worship - the Marquise Dorimena, for the sake of which a dinner was presented with a performance.

Ms. Jourdain, so as not to get in the way, was sent to her sister's dinner this afternoon. She did not know anything about the husband’s plan, she herself was concerned about the fate of her daughter: Lucille seemed to reciprocate the tender feelings of a young man named Cleont, who was very suitable for her son-in-law to Mrs. Jourdain. At her request, Nicole, interested in marrying the young mistress, since she herself was going to marry Cleont's servant, Coviel, brought the young man. Ms. Jourdain immediately sent him to her husband to ask for her daughter's hand.

However, Lucille Cleont did not answer Jourdain's first and, in fact, only demand for the hand job applicant - he was not a nobleman, while his father wanted to make the daughter, in the worst case, a marquise, or even a duchess. Having received a decisive refusal, Cleont was depressed, but Coviel believed that not everything was lost. The faithful servant planned to play a joke with Jourdain, since he had friends and actors, and the appropriate costumes were at hand.

Meanwhile, the arrival of Count Earl of Dorant and the Marquise of Dorimena was reported. The count did not bring the lady to dinner out of a desire to make the landlord pleasant: he himself had been caring for the widow of the marquise, but had no opportunity to see her either at her or at home - this could compromise Dorimena. In addition, all the crazy expenses of Jourdain for gifts and various entertainments for her, he deftly attributed to himself, which in the end won the female heart.

Pretty amusing the noble guests with an elaborate clumsy bow and the same welcoming speech, Jourdain invited them to a sumptuous table.

The marquise, not without pleasure, absorbed delicious dishes to the accompaniment of exotic compliments of the eccentric bourgeois, when all the splendor was unexpectedly violated by the appearance of an angry Ms. Jourdain. Now she understood why they wanted to take her to dinner with her sister so that her husband could calmly let down money with outside women. Jourdain and Dorant began to assure her - that the count gives the marquise a dinner, and he pays for everything, but their assurances did not in any way temper the ardor of the offended wife. After her husband, Mrs. Jourdain took up a guest who should be ashamed to bring discord into an honest family. The embarrassed and offended marquise rose from the table and left the owners; Dorant followed her.

Only noble gentlemen left, as was reported about the new visitor. It turned out to be a disguised Coviel, who introduced himself as a friend of Mr. Jourdain's father. The deceased father of the owner of the house was, according to him, not a merchant, as everyone around said, but by no means a real nobleman. Coviel’s calculation was justified: after such a statement, he could tell anything, without fear that Jourdain would doubt the veracity of his speeches.

Coviel told Jourdain that his good friend, the son of the Turkish Sultan, who was madly in love with him, Jourdain, daughter, arrived in Paris. The son of the sultan wants to ask Lucille for his hands, and in order for his father-in-law to be worthy of a new kin, he decided to ordain him to his mothers, in our opinion - paladins. Jourdain was delighted.

The son of the Turkish Sultan was represented by the disguised Cleon. He spoke in a terrible gibberish, which Coviel allegedly translated into French. The main muftis and dervishes arrived with the main Turk and had a lot of fun during the initiation ceremony: she came out very colorful, with Turkish music, songs and dances, as well as with the ritual beating of the initiate with sticks.

The dorant, dedicated to Coviel’s plan, finally managed to persuade Dorimen to return, seduced by the opportunity to enjoy a funny spectacle, and then another excellent ballet. The count and marquise with the most serious look congratulated Jourdain on the assignment of a high title to him, and he was eager to hand over his daughter to the son of the Turkish sultan as soon as possible. Lucille at first did not want to go for a jester-Turk, but as soon as she recognized him as a disguised Cleont, she immediately agreed, pretending to obediently fulfill her daughter's duty. Ms. Jourdain, in turn, sternly stated that the Turkish scarecrow did not see her daughter as her own ears. But as soon as Coviel whispered a few words in her ear, her mother changed her anger to mercy.

Jourdain solemnly joined the hands of a young man and a girl, giving a parental blessing on their marriage, and then sent for a notary public. Another couple decided to use the services of the same notary - Dorant and Dorimena. In anticipation of the representative of the law, all those present had a glorious time, enjoying the ballet set by the dance teacher.